scene at the harris teeter, shirlington

i took a leisurely trip to the harris teeter last sunday evening to see what they had in store for me to pick up. a grocery trip for sport alone. i never get to savor shopping here because i'm always in a raging dash.



why harris teeter, and not safeway? why not whole foods tonight? the teeter happens to be the one with the most capacity for budding romance due to its proximity to me as well as upscale condos, dogpark, gym, library [hee, kidding], chinese takeout, ice cream shop and much more. beyond that, it's become known as a pick-up spot. well at least a good spot to gaze on good-lookings.


i've been told sunday is the day to go due to the throng of supposed hotties runnin around squirreling up for the week ahead. as a professional grocery shopper, i avoid a sunday trip to the store because everyone knows it's for rookies.



the produce and dairy items are entirely picked over, you have to mix and match cartons of eggs putting a full uncracked dozen together only if you're lucky. bins where there should be basics like garlic and onions are empty except for the papery skins, remnants and rogue cloves. one lonely sad and too dark avocado. what is it with this town and lack of groceries on sundays? this is a metropolis, no?

somewhat prepared to engage in conversation after studying some tactics for such an occasion, i don my juicy couture mexican dress: cute but appropriate grocery store attire. i pull into the parking garage perky and optimistic. oh hell. bad sign: plenty of parking. what's the? there's never parking at the teeter.



well i'm here, i do need a few items. perhaps i'm slightly too early [though i'm here at the exact time my friend was last sunday when she saw loads of desirables]. so i'm gonna take my leisurely and peruse all aisles. including frozen. including canned vegetables. i even went to the pesky upstairs aisles just to see what's at the teeter tonight. [and for the love of bacchus, why is the wine inconveniently located upstairs?]


i'll admit i've seen a lot of cuties here on past trips but i'm always in such a flippin hurry there's no time for extended eye contact, smiling, hair flipping, questions about various cuts of meat, and so on. consider yourselves fortunate, those who can calmly enjoy grocery shopping and checking people out. lucky grocery checker-outers.




hmm. nada, nothing, nope. not you either buddy. son of a gun. came up dry. not one person was remotely attractive. not even one dude with a chic. or a baby buggy. wonder what gives. don't worry i'll check back and re-report. hopefully with some news. perhaps i shoulda chosen safeway tonight. [though i think the day for safeway is monday.]